Mourning

When someone close to us dies, we inevitably enter into a process of mourning. This is an involuntary, unavoidable and instinctive process. Our psyches and our bodies react to codes that are embedded in our subconscious and collective minds and which are completely beyond our control.  Each person will go through his or her mourning process in a unique and individual manner. No one can say whether it is right or wrong – it is something that pertains only to the person who is going through it. Some will be able to vent their grief, their dispair and their pain, and others will bear it differently. Some will find themselves crying through other parts of their bodies or will experience an urgent need to sleep in order to assimilate their pain.

I have noticed that the more difficult the relationship with the person who leaves us has been, the harder the mourning period becomes. We are not only saying good-bye to the person who has left us but also to things that remained unfinished or unresolved; love that was not expressed, words that were not said, wounds that did not heal, resentments that were not overcome, efforts that were not made.

I hope to live my life in such a way that when my time comes to part from this world, those who stay behind can surely miss me a bit, but I want them to be certain that they were immensely loved by me, that they made me happy and that they were all especially important during my life and that my gratefulness for their company during this journey that we call life will be eternal.